Where did that come from?

If you read my blog from yesterday you may be wondering 'Where did that come from?' I just had a couple of weeks off to study and I spent hours and hours writing and researching. Sunday was my first Sunday back in the pulpit, leading worship, etc. and I really struggled. I found myself 'doing church' or 'doing my job'. I knew that something was wrong but I just could not put my finger on it. As I prayed about it I began to realize that I had slipped into filling a pulpit, trying to grow a church, trying to make people happy.

• God was saying "now is the time to stretch the boundaries, the time to challenge and be challenged, the time to take tremendous steps of faith, the time for the mustard seed".

• My faith level was saying "sure, sounds good, but have you looked around at my reality? I am afraid - there is a precarious balancing act going on and I do not want to upset the apple cart, wouldn't it be better just to accept what is?"

The moment I realized what was in my heart I confessed it to God and asked Him for His picture again. I simply cannot accept just filling a place or position. There is too much at stake, too many broken lives, too much eternity . . . it does not matter what anyone else expects, it matters what God has given me to do.

Thanks for praying. God is challenging me to grow so that we can grow. I cannot lead where I have not been.

Sermons and Life

On Sunday I gave a sermon about the Garden of Gethsemane and how Jesus struggled to do the Father's will. The sermon came from Matthew 26:36-46 which clearly shows that Jesus was not always sure of the direction that God was leading him and that when he found out he was not always excited about it. I ended the sermon with these points --

What we can take away from this snapshot of Jesus' life

1. If Jesus and his disciples were figuring out God's will as they went we should not be shocked that we are too;
2. More than anything else Jesus wanted his disciples to hear him and care about what he cared about;
3. Jesus did not want to do what the Father was asking him to do, but he was willing. We will run into the same situation many, many times.

We are part of God's plan

1. His plan is larger than us, we are simply a small part of what God is doing in the lives of those around us, in our community, in our nation and in our world;
2. God's plan operates on a spiritual level and we have to constantly remind ourselves that what we see is not what matters most.

That sermon was easier to preach than it is to live. I know that I struggle with the desire to know what, when, where and how life is going to unfold. Probably my greatest struggle right now is that I do not want to accept what is acceptable as a pastor, as a father, as a husband, as a Christian. It seems so easy to be lulled into a sameness and a deadness of faith and expectation.

I want a keen sense that I am not just going through the motions, or accepting less than God's best in ministry, in my family, in me. Please pray for me in this regard. In particular -

1. I want a burning passion for people who are lost without Jesus Christ (I want to be willing to be a fool for Christ - 1 Corinthians 1:25-29);
2. I want to live a life of purpose and power (no compromises or backward thinking - 2 Timothy 2:7);
3. I want everything I do and say to draw people to God the Father through Jesus Christ (no wasted words or emotions, just what will lead others to Christ - Colossians 3:17, 23-24).

By the way, if you are interested in the sermon, or in the website for the churches, the links are below. Thanks for praying with me, for the churches, for the lost; and thanks for praying for me too.

The Way of the Cross: The Garden of Gethsemane

SeeWhatGodIsDoing.com